PEG,

WHY AM I WRITING YOU A LETTER WHEN I'M GOING TO SEE YOU IN AN HOUR AND COULD MORE EASILY TALK TO YOU? TO BE ABLE TO THINK ABOUT IT, I THINK. THINGS COME OUT IN A LETTER TO SOMEONE THAT NEVER MAKE IT IN AN ACROSS-THE-TABLE KIND OF CONVERSATION. WHICH IS SOMETHING I KNOW YOU KNOW, WITH WHAT LITTLE I'VE READ OF YOURS.
THE IDEA OF TOGETHER WRITING A STORY: FEELS RIGHT. I'M HERE TWO DAYS AND ALREADY I'M RECOGNISING THE IMPORTANCE OF THIS TIME FOR ME. PROGRESS IS PAINFUL, AND HEADY, AND SOMETIMES GOES UNNOTICED, BUT NOT NOW.
THINGS HAPPEN FOR REASONS. I CAME DOWN HERE WITH THE DIM INTUITION THAT SOMETHING WOULD BE WRITTEN, AND THAT IT WAS AN IMPORTANT THING FOR ME, BUT HADN'T THOUGHT OR DREAMT OF ANY KIND OF COLLABORATION.
YOU'VE SAID A FEW STRONG THINGS, FULL OF SPIRIT, THAT'VE HIT MY POINTS, THAT'VE REQUIRED ME TO THINK. TODAY ON THE ROCKS, YOU ALMOST ATTACKED ME WHEN I STARTED ON MY MUSE THING. IT PUT ME OFF, AND I GUESS I AGREED QUICKLY ENOUGH, BUT I DO BELIEVE THAT THERE'S SOMETHING TO MEN AND WOMEN BEING TOGETHER. I MEAN, WOMAN CAN JUST AS EASILY BE INSPIRED BY MEN. IT CAN GO BOTH WAYS, THOUGH THAT'S NOT REALLY THE STEREOTYPE. IT'S ALWAYS THE "LITTLE WOMAN" WHO DARNS THE SOCKS WHILE SOLDIER MALE IS OFF FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT, INSPIRED BY MOM AND GOD AND COUNTRY.
MEN ARE UNFEELING, SAYS THIS MYTH. AND THEY DESPERATELY NEED TO FEEL, AND SO THEY NEED WOMEN, WHO DO FEEL. "TOO GOD-DAMNED MUCH," SAYS ANY OLD GUY NEXT TO ME AT A BAR. (NOT THIS BAR. NO ONE'S AT THE WRECK, WHICH IS WHERE I'M AT. JUST OF COURSE RANDLE. RANDLE SAYS HI).
WOMEN ARE UNSTABLE. WOMEN ARE TOO EMOTIONAL. WOMEN ARE ALWAYS JEALOUS AND IMAGINE THEIR MEN LOOKING AT EVERY PRETTY PLAYBOY BLONDE WITH UNFAITHFUL LUST. SAD THING IS THEY'RE MOSTLY RIGHT ABOUT IT. MEN ARE PIGS. TAKE IT FROM AN INSIDER (AND DON'T EVER TELL A MAN I TOLD YOU THIS ... BOY WOULD THEY BE PISSED IF THEY KNEW I TOLD YOU): IT'S NOT THE FACE YOU'RE FUCKING, IT'S THE FUCKING YOUR FACING. THAT'S THE PERRENIAL MALE NON-COMITTAL PHILOSOPHY IN A NUTSHELL. IT'S ALMOST UNDERSTOOD AMONG US. WOMEN AREN'T FOR BEING FRIENDS WITH. PARTS IS PARTS, AND IF YOU GET LUCKY THEY'LL COOK DINNER AND CLEAN UP AFTER YOU.
"YOU'RE NOT A MAN," YOU SAID. I GUESS I'M NOT. NOT A MAN-MAN. OR RATHER I'M MORE OF A MAN FOR BEING ABLE TO BE FRIENDS WITH WOMEN. AT LEAST, THAT IS, BEFORE CORRINA.
FUNNY THOUGHT: B.C. (BEFORE CORRINA).
LIFE B.C. FOR ME WAS QUITE A BIT DIFFERENT. SHE WAS JEALOUS THOUGH I GUESS I GAVE HER REASON TO BE TOWARD THE END, BUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME CAN'T SEE HOW I DID EARLY ON.
I TURNED INTO HER MAN-MAN. IN A LOT OF WAYS I BECAME THE SORT OF MAN I DESPISE . . . THE KIND SHE KEPT SAYING SHE WAS SO GLAD I WAS DIFFERENT FROM IN THE BEGINNING. I BECAME HER WORST FEAR, ALMOST AS IF SHE HAD EXPECTED ME TO.
WELL, WHATEVER, I HAVE TO GO PICK YOU UP NOW,
SAM